I’m going to preface this by saying: This is not easy to put into written words. It’s full of raw confusion, transparency and to be completely honest, fear.
I wanted “The Blog” to be an avenue to connect with the tribe that is Heritage Style on a more personal level, that had nothing to do with selling jewelry.
Being a small business owner is hard. Don’t get me wrong, playing with jewels and clothes all day is FUN. The flexibility is SO great. Getting to make friends through my social media platform is the icing on the cake. With that- record breaking months of sales and/or engagement create an addictive high; and like all highs, that comes with the lowest of lows. Generally, rock-bottom, emotional plummets that really test your self-worth and faith in your business.
Thats where I am. Again, I really struggle with being this transparent, as I don’t like to show any sort of weakness or sign that I question what my daily purpose is.
The past 10 days I’ve been in a funk. Dark circles under my eyes, stressed, burned out and questioning the entire vision of Heritage Style. “Is the competition closing in on me?”; “Does everyone that wants Turquoise jewelry already have it?”; “Are people just plain sick of seeing photos of me and Heritage Style pieces on social media?’. The brutal truth is, theres really no way for me to come to a concrete answer to these doubts. Truth be told, I haven’t even looked at the monetary success of the last 10 days to bear any weight on this feeling.
Ironically, I also fell into an incredible opportunity this week. One that is exciting, but comes with loads of pressure. I will stand on my own two feet, Heritage Style and Heritage Style alone, at the largest trade show in the country, the National Finals Rodeo. For me, that’s something to be extremely proud of.
Another brutal truth about being a small business owner: you have a lot of time alone with your thoughts. If you’re like me, sometimes those thoughts can begin to consume you and get the best of you.
Friendly reminder, cherry picking the highlights of your life for social media is the easy part. Surely, everyone goes through lulls where they question “Is this really going to work?” and they wouldn’t want the world knowing either would they? As much as I hate to admit it, it’s probably good for my ego.
I don’t really know where to go from here. Step back, regroup and reset, remind myself that surely we all have self-doubt from time to time. Have FAITH that this feeling will subside in due time. Understanding becoming obsessed with sell more, sell more, sell more, isn’t heathy or necessary for that matter. Taking the next, however many days it takes to focus on contentment and the self-worth that come with that. And with that, I’m going to work on being less connected for that magic time period it takes to get there.
Maybe you’ve been through this, are in this season, or maybe will be there at some point- know that whatever your struggle is, YOU ARE NOT ALONE, and that this too shall pass.